Their Journey Back
by CharmedGurlie
Summary: This is my take on how Lorelai and Chris's trip to Paris should have ended, and Luke and Lorelai's journey back to each other. SongFic, JavaJunkie!
1. Chapter 1

**This is a story about how episode 7-7 _French Twist,_ should have gone, and how Luke and Lorelai find their way back to each other. It's a fully LL story. There'll prob be about 4 chapters, all song fics. Please Review!! I love to get feedback!**

**Disclaimer: I always forget this….I don't own it. Shocking, huh? The characters are The CW's, the song is I'm not Missing You by Stacy Orrico.

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**Chapter 1- I'm Not Missing You**

"Marry me, Lorelai."

She sat in the empty restaurant, staring at Chris, while every employee at the restaurant was staring at her. Creepy, by the way. She stared into his eyes, so filled with love. She could tell that he really wanted this, but;

"No," Lorelai eventually managed, although it came out a little harsher than she'd meant.

_Oh, Oh  
I'm not missing you  
Been through just about everything that I could go through  
When it comes to relationships  
Don't know what I was missing or why I ain't listen  
When I told myself that was it  
Now here I go, hurt again  
Cause of my curiosity  
Now that it's over  
What else could it be,_

"What? Lor, come on," Chris pleaded.

"Chris-,"

"Why not?"

"I just-; I can't Chris, it isn't right."

"Lor,"

"Christopher," Lorelai cut in sharply, "can we please just go?" She got from the table and headed for the exit. After settling the bill, Chris met her outside and they made their way back to the hotel in silence. Lorelai hadn't meant to come off so cold toward Chris, but she wasn't about to just jump into a marriage. Sure, she and Chris's relationship had been going well, but with them, it was always up and down. You never knew when Chris was going to bail. He was still that sixteen year old boy, and unfortunately, when she was with him, she became that sixteen year old girl again. Their relationship never had any real stability.

_I made a promise never to settle  
Why didn't I keep it?  
Cause I hated the heartbreak  
Crying and cheating, the fooling around_

_(But) I'm not missing you  
I'm not going through the motions  
Waiting and hoping you call me  
I'm not missing you  
You might have had me open  
But I must be going because  
I got life to do_

About a week later, Lorelai and Rory were sitting in the living room, discussing the now infamous Paris trip.

"What happened?" Rory asked.

"I don't really know. I just-. I couldn't do it. It just felt so…wrong," Lorelai told her.

"Wrong how?"

"I mean, it was all so sudden, and you weren't there, and-," Lorelai drifted off.

"And it was with the wrong guy?" Rory suggested.

_I know I'm usually hanging on  
I used to hate to see you gone  
But this time it's different  
I don't even feel the distance  
I'm not missing  
I'm not missing you_

"Rory…"

"Alright, I was just saying. Dad will always be my father, but Luke is….Luke. He's always been there for us, especially when Dad would bail. Just because you had me with dad doesn't mean that you're meant to be together," Rory reasoned. Her mother, ever stubborn, didn't respond. "I have to go," Rory told her. She could tell that her mom needed some time to think things over. "Schoolwork calls. Are you gonna be okay?"

"Yup," Lorelai told her.

"Okay. Let me know if you need anything." Rory hugged her mom and headed to the door. She swung it open to find Chris, poised to knock.

_It's a shame in a way cause  
I feel that I may not ever find the right one for me  
Did I leave him, is he right in front of my face oh  
Will my true love ever be?  
Why would I go on a search again  
When I know what the end will be  
What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?_

"Uh, hey dad," Rory greeted her father uncomfortably.

"Hey kid!" Chris greeted cheerfully, oblivious as usual. What a shocker. "Is your mom around?"

"Uh, yea. She's inside. But I was just leaving, so I'll see you later," Rory said before scooting past her father and heading for her car. Whatever Chris was there for, it was almost guaranteed to end badly. Things usually did whenever Chris was involved. This time, Rory almost hated to admit, she almost hoped it wouldn't end well. Anyone could see that Lorelai did _not _belong with Chris. Anyone except, apparently, Lorelai.

_I made a promise never to settle  
Why didn't I keep it?  
Cause I hated the heartbreak  
Crying and cheating, the fooling around_

"Her Lor," Chris greeted as he entered the living room, startling Lorelai.

"Uh, hey Chris. What are you doing here?" They hadn't spoken since they'd returned form Paris.

"I wanted to talk to you."

"So talk," Lorelai said, a little more coldly then she'd expected.

"Right. So, uh, Paris. Maybe you were right. Maybe it was too fast to get married. But we can have a long engagement-,"

"Whoa, Chris, we are _not _engaged." Lorelai interrupted.

'Then maybe we can, you know, live together, see how well it works out-,"

"Chris, stop," Lorelai interrupted again, shaking her head.

"What?"

"This isn't gonna work."

_(But) I'm not missing you  
I'm not going through the motions  
Waiting and hoping you call me  
I'm not missing you  
You might have had me open  
But I must be going because  
I got life to do  
I know I'm usually hanging on  
I used to hate to see you gone  
But this time it's different  
I don't even feel the distance  
I'm not missing  
I'm not missing you_

"Not if we don't try! We used to be so good together."

"Used to be. Past tense. We're not the same people we were in high school. I am not the same girl you knew at sixteen. I raised a kid, started my own inn. Just because you got me a piece of pizza in tenth grade because I missed lunch does _not_ mean that we should get _married_."

"How do you know that we can't make it work?" Chris asked.

"Because, Chris, my heart just isn't in it. I can't change how I feel." She said softly.

_No I can't be with you  
Cause I'm scared felt like I was falling when you left me  
I can't keep going through life  
Unaware of what I missed  
And the person I could be  
Love's good when it's right  
And when it's left in your memory  
All the times I let you down  
I guess love will be nice for someone else's life_

"Is this still about that diner guy that broke your heart?" Chris asked.

"This is not about Luke, Christopher," Lorelai lied.

"Then why can't you just give us a try?" Chris pleaded.

"Because I don't love you, Chris!" Lorelai exclaimed suddenly, surprising even herself. Chris looked at her in shock. "I'm sorry," she told him. And she meant it. It was never her intent to hurt him.

Chris looked at Lorelai with a pained expression.

_(But) I'm not missing you  
I'm not going through the motions  
Waiting and hoping you call me  
I'm not missing you  
You might have had me open  
But I must be going because  
I got life to do  
I know I'm usually hanging on  
I used to hate to see you gone (I used to hate it)  
Oh different, oh feel the distance  
I'm not missing  
I'm not missing you_

"What happened to us Lor?" He asked. "I always thought that we'd end up together."

"We grew up, Chris. And honestly, you screwed up. You got me pregnant and left. You came back sixteen years later, and I thought maybe you'd changed. But no, Sherry got pregnant and you were gone again. After that feel apart, you just expected me to drop my life and go running back to you? That's not how it works, Chris. You broke up my relationship with the only guy I've ever really been in love with. Twice. And, granted, the second time was pretty much all on me. But I can't do this anymore. I don't _want_ to. I want to be with someone I love, who won't just pick up and leave all of a sudden. And yes, I may have already ruined my chance at that, but it's not fair to either of us to pretend that we're gonna be together forever." Lorelai looked at Chris, expected a not-too-happy response to her rant.

"So this _is _about Luke."

"It's not _about _Luke. Yes, I love Luke, and I hope that one day we can fix what we so badly screwed up. But what I feel for Luke doesn't change how I feel about you."

_I'm not going through the motions  
Waiting and hoping you call me (knockin' at my door)  
You might have had me open  
But I must be going because (it's the best day of my life) _

"I want you to be happy Lor, I really do. But I don't think he's the one who can make you happy. And I think that you're gonna regret this." Lorelai sighed. She had tried to be nice, but she just couldn't deal with him anymore.

"Goodbye, Christopher," Lorelai said coldly, not so subtly hinting that it was time for him to leave. He turned and walked out the door, slamming it behind him.

Lorelai flopped back down on the couch and sighed. She had done the right thing. She knew that, and she didn't regret it in the least. It wasn't fair to keep leading Chris on. But that didn't exactly leave her in the ideal situation. She was by herself in her dark, empty living room, all alone. She hadn't spoken to the man she loved since that awful run-in at the supermarket. The things he had said, they hurt her. Sure, she'd pretty much deserved it. And she knew he was talking out of the hurt that she caused him. But did he mean it when he said that they didn't belong together? Lorelai wasn't sure. But she knew what she felt: that they were meant to be.

_I know I'm usually hanging on  
I used to hate to see you gone  
Oh different, feel the distance _

With Chris, it had been a whole different story. Every time they had gotten together, the timing was always wrong and it would blow up in their faces. But this time was different. They'd given it a real, full-fledged shot. Lorelai was glad that they did, because now she would never look back and wonder "_What if,"_ She realized now that where Chris was concerned, timing had never been the real problem. It was Chris. They just weren't meant to be together. Because Chris wasn't Luke.

_I'm not missing  
I'm not missing you I'm not missing you (oh baby)  
I'm not missing you  
I'm so over you  
It ain't even a problem_

Luke. What was she supposed to do about Luke? She'd screwed it all up so badly. Yea, he'd hurt her-big time. But what she did was so much worse. Could Luke ever forgive her? Lorelai wasn't sure. But there was only one way to find out.

**TBC**

**Review please!!**


	2. What Hurts the Most

**Chapter two is here! The song is What Hurts the Most by Rascal Flatts, and no, I don't own it. I hope you enjoy…..review please!!**

**Thank you to those of you who reviewed the last chapter...i got some great feedback! Someone commented that songfics are a little cheesy, and I agree, they can be cheesy, but I really think these songs fit the story. Thanks for your opinion though!**

**Oh, and in this story April is not staying with Luke. That's not really important, but I just thought you might like to know. :)  
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**Chapter 2- What Hurts the Most**

"Just wait!" Luke told Lorelai. Where was all of this coming from? She avoids him for days and now she wants to run off and elope? There had to be something else making her upset.

"No! I'm not waiting! It's now or never!" Lorelai exclaimed.

"I don't like ultimatums!"

"Well I don't like Mondays but unfortunately they come around eventually."

"I can't just jump like this."

"Well, I'm sorry to hear that. And I have to go." Lorelai stated. Luke stood there and watched her walk away. He knew that he should go after her; talk to her. But he didn't. He stood there, in front of his diner, and watched the woman he loved more than anything in the world walk out of his life.

_I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house  
That don't bother me  
I can take a few tears now and then  
and just let 'em out  
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while  
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me  
There are days every now and again  
I pretend I'm ok, but that's not what gets me

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_

"You were right. I need to be faster. I need to move faster, I need to think faster. And, well, here I am," Luke told her on her doorstep, after telling her all of his plans- they were going to run away and elope. Or, so Luke thought.

"It's over." Lorelai told him.

"No, you can't say that. You can't just say that it's over. It's not over. You can't just decide that it's over. I'm in this, too. You know I'm not gonna let it be over. You said, "be ready now or never." I'm ready now."

"Luke."

"Let's go. Let's do this. Let's get married right now. Let's go."

"I slept with Christopher."

_What hurts the most  
was being so close  
And havin' so much to say  
And watchin' you walk away  
And never knowin'  
What could've been  
And not seein' that lovin' you  
Is what I was trying to do

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_

Luke sprang up in bed suddenly. He had been having the same nightmare over and over almost every night for months now. The worst part was that it _wasn't _a nightmare. All of it had happened, and Luke had the broken heart to prove it.

He rolled over and looked at the clock. It was about 5, so Luke decided to get up and start his day. Just another boring, routine day. Without Lorelai.

After showering and getting dressed, he headed downstairs, grabbing his hat along the way. Not his usual blue hat that Lorelai gave him. No, he didn't wear that anymore. He wore a black hat. It wasn't as comfortable; it didn't fit as well. But then again, Luke really didn't care. Not just about the hat, but about just about everything. Nothing was the same anymore. He sighed as he unlocked the door to the diner and flipped the sign to open, wondering how everything had gotten so bad.

They had been so happy when they'd gotten engaged. He was happier than he'd ever been. But then he found out about April- that threw a huge curveball at him.

Maybe he had pushed Lorelai away; shut her out. But he definitely never meant to. She was his world-he thought that she knew that.

He felt awful for the way he had treated her. He just wished that she had come to him sooner; told him how she felt. He figured he brought it on himself, really. He had always been able to tell when something was bothering Lorelai. Always. There had just been so much going on at once, Luke took Lorelai for granted and lost sight of what was important to him. But at the same time, Lorelai had never been one to hide her opinions. Luke just couldn't understand why she hadn't said something all those months- why she had just let it all build up, only to come crashing down.

_It's hard to deal with the pain of losin' you every where I go  
But I'm doin' it  
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone  
_

"Uh, Luke?" Luke was snapped out of his thoughts as he found Sookie in front of him, looking worried. Apparently he had been lost in his thoughts longer than he'd thought.

"Yea. Sorry Sookie. What do you need?"

"Just coffee. To go."

"Coming right up," He told her as he turned around to get her coffee.

"Thanks. Uh, Luke?" Sookie asked, almost hesitantly.

"Yea?" He replied, putting her coffee on the counter in front of her.

"Are you…doing okay?"

"Yea, I'm fine," Luke replied nonchalantly, even though they both knew he was lying. Sookie, not believing him at all, decided to just let it go. As much as she wished that Lorelai was still with Luke, it really wasn't her place to go messing around in their relationship. Or lack there of. So she paid Luke and left.

Luke decided to take the coffee pot around and refill the customers' mugs. He really hated coffee. Not even because it killed you. Because it reminded him so much of Lorelai. Every thing reminded him of Lorelai. There really was no way to avoid it. Unless he wanted to live in a cardboard box or something; but even that would probably remind him of her.

He wished, so much, that he'd gone after her that day. But really, would anything have been that different? He wouldn't have eloped. He knew that that wasn't what she really wanted. She would have regretted it eventually. Luke knew that Lorelai had wanted a wedding with her family and friends. Well, her friends at least. And not to mention, getting married was no way to just solve their problems.

The worst part of this whole thing was that he didn't just lose his girlfriend and fiancée. He had lost his best friend. The one woman that he could talk to. That knew him; really knew him. They had been friends long before they had been a couple. Yea, he'd loved her all along, but he was much more content to have her in his life as just a friend than not at all.

_Still harder  
Gettin' up, gettin' dressed, livin' with this regret, but I know  
If I could do it over  
I would trade, give away, all the words that I saved in my heart that I left unspoken_

Luke had asked himself once: If he knew that their relationship would end like this, would he have kissed her that night on the inn porch? At first, he said no, that losing her as a friend and a fiancee wasn't worth it. But the more he thought about, the more he realized that he would have still kissed her. Even though in the end, he lost Lorelai, those two years that they were together were the best years of his life. If he could do it all again, he never would have pushed her away.

He hated himself for losing her. He had no one to blame but himself. He never should have hidden April from Lorelai. He had just gotten so scared. He and Lorelai had talked about having kids, and now he suddenly had a twelve year old daughter that he didn't even know about. And he was scared. Scared of being a bad father, and scared of losing Lorelai because of it.

_What hurts the most  
Is being so close  
And havin' so much to say  
And watchin' you walk away  
And never knowin'  
What could've been  
And not seein' that lovin' you  
Is what I was tryin' to do_

Lorelai was such an amazing parent. She had raised Rory on her own at 16, with little help from anyone. She and Rory had the most amazing relationship, one that anyone would be envious of. And here Luke was, a grown man, with no idea how to act around his own kid. He didn't want Lorelai to think he was a bad father. He didn't want her to decide not to have kids with him. So he, unintentionally, shut her out of that part of his life.

And that's how he got here. Behind the counter of his diner, wiping away at the counter like it was going out of style. Alone. And Lorelai was; well, he wasn't really sure. He heard that she was with Chris now, though. As much as he hated Chris, he really did hope that Lorelai was happy. Luke still loved her, with all of his heart. He wanted nothing but the best for her, though he doubted Chris was it.

_  
Not seeing that loving you  
That's what I was trying to do_

Maybe there was still a chance for Luke? He really didn't know.

How was he supposed to fix this mess?

**TBC!**

**Don't forget to review….you know you wanna!**


	3. Come Back To Me

**Thank you to those of you who reviewed…it means a lot to me, and please review again! This is going to be a short story, so the next chapter will be the last. **

**Disclaimer- Not mine. Gasp! The song is Come Back To Me, by Vanessa Hudgens. I'm not a huge fan of it, but I thought the lyrics fit.**

**Chapter 3- Come Back To Me**

"And he left?" Sookie asked.

"He left," Lorelai reassured, having just told Sookie about Paris (the city, not the person) and its fallout.

"So, he's gone."

"Uh, yea, Soak," Lorelai replied with a _duh _look on her face.

"So does this mea you and Luke-," Sookie raised her eyebrows suggestively. Lorelai smiled sadly, then sighed.

_Everyday I try to play another game_

_But my heart can't take it_

_I try to find another Boy_

_But all the while I can't face it_

_Why do I miss you so much?_

_I wanna stop to turn inside_

_Oh baby please_

_Give us one more try_

"I don't know, Sookie. I mean, the things I did; I screwed up more than I thought was humanly possible."

"You guys will work it out," Sookie reassured her.

"Yea, but you didn't see the look in his eyes. He was so hurt. And I caused that. I don't think that I'll ever be able to forgive _myself._ How can I expect him to forgive me?"

"Honey, he _loves _you. And you love him. I've never seen twp people more perfectly matched. You'll work it out."

"I hope so," Lorelai said, barely above a whisper as she turned to leave the kitchen.

_See you out with all your friends_

_Laughing it up as you pretend _

_To have a good time, I know_

_Cause I'm living the same life_

_I'm about to got to say_

_We can't keep living this same way_

_So I'll be the one_

_Yeah I'll say it I'll say it I'll say it again_

"Sweetie," Sookie called, "For what it's worth, you did the right thing. Regardless of what happens with Luke, I for one am kind of glad Chris is out of here. He's kinda annoying." Lorelai smiled slightly at her friend before leaving. The girl had a point.

_Baby come back to me_

_In my heart I still believe_

_We were meant to be_

_Together so whatever it takes_

Lorelai wanted to go and talk to Luke. She really did. But she was scared.

They'd hurt each other so badly; ruined everything. This wasn't supposed to happen to them. They were the perfect couple; everyone said they belonged together. But now, somehow, they were both alone, both hurting. Neither knew when, or how, it had all come crashing down so quickly.

_Baby come back to me_

_I should've never set you free_

_Love maybe_

_Come back_

Lorelai was only sure of one thing: she loved Luke. But unfortunately, life wasn't that simple.

For one, how could Luke forgive her? She'd slept with Christopher. She _slept _with _Christopher. _Of all the things that she could have and with all the people, this had to be the worst thing that she ever could have done. Chris was the one man that Luke was uncomfortable with. He had seen Chris go in and out of the Gilmore Girls lives, leaving them broken hearted, and Luke was always the one left to pick up the pieces. But for some unknown reason, the girls always let Chris back into their lives. Luke has always been uncomfortable with Chris, especially since her parents vow renewal, and she just went and made everything worse.

_I wanna call, but then I stall_

_Cause after all I just couldn't take it_

_Cause if your play was to push me away_

_You know the day, my heart you'd break it_

At the same time, she wasn't the only one at fault. Luke had messed up too. He lied to her. For _two_ _months_. Lorelai understood that he panicked, but then he pushed her away, and that hurt her more than anything. Maybe Lorelai had just been selfish. After all, Luke had waited years for Lorelai, watching her with man after man. All Luke was asking for was a little time with his own daughter. Why couldn't she just have given him a couple of months, or at least talked to him?

Regardless, Lorelai wasn't sure she could open herself up to that much pain and vulnerability again. No man had ever _really_ been able to hurt her before. She had never really _loved _any man before Luke. But Luke- he'd crushed her. Was she really willing to risk going through that again? Lorelai asked herself that question…was she willing? The more Lorelai wondered, the more she realized she was asking the wrong question.

Was life really worth it if she wasn't willing to risk it; for true love?

_I know we made a mistake_

_It's just like your foolish pride_

_Come back to me_

_Let us try, let us try, let us try_

Lorelai wasn't sure what to do anymore. She decided to get some fresh air, so she decided to go to a walk to clear her head. She walked around the quiet, peaceful town. It was late, and most people were home with their families.

Lorelai wandered about aimlessly, and before she knew it, she found herself in front of Luke's. It was the only building in the square still lit up, and Lorelai could see Luke behind the counter. Her heart skipped a beat at the sight of him. It had been so long since she had seen him. Too long, Lorelai decided. It was now or never. She took a deep breath and pushed open the door, the familiar jingle ringing throughout the empty diner as she did.

_Baby come back to me_

_In my heart I still believe_

_We were meant to be_

_Together so whatever it takes_

_Baby come back to me_

_I should've never set you free_

_Love maybe_

_Come back_

"We're closed," Luke growled. Upon hearing no response, he glanced up. Lorelai's breath caught when their eyes met. Those eyes, so full of intensity. Lorelai noticed something else in Luke's eyes- something new: hurt; pain. Lorelai had caused that. And she hated herself for it.

"L-Lorelai," Luke stuttered in shock.

"Hey," Lorelai replied sheepishly, not moving from her spot by the door.

"Uh, come on in. Sit down. Do you want some coffee?" Luke asked, regaining his composure. Lorelai nodded as she sat down at the counter and he placed the coffee in front of her. She half expected to get the usual 'coffee will kill you rant' and she was sad when Luke said nothing. She realized that there would be no more banter between them after what happened. At least, not if they didn't fix what went so horribly wrong.

_You know you miss your Baby_

_And I can see that you think about me_

_So why do you act like you don't care_

_Like all the love between us isn't there _

"So, uh, how are you doing?" Luke asked.

"I'm alright," Lorelai responded.

"Good, good. That's…good."

"Yea," Lorelai replied with a slight smile. "How 'bout you?"

"Ya know, been better," Luke told her. She replied with a nod, sipping her coffee.

_"And I'll go back to just being the guy who pours your coffee" _Lorelai grimaced at the memory.

"Is the coffee that bad?" Luke asked jokingly. Lorelai laughed slightly, shaking her head.

_I know that you're upset_

_I know I did you wrong_

_I know that you want me to pay_

_For all the pain I've caused_

_But in the end it all comes down_

_To just one thing_

_It's you and me_

Suddenly, neither of them knew what to say. They were out of small talk. There was so much that needed to be said; but it was hard. They were silent, awkwardly, for a couple of minutes before Lorelai broke the silence.

"So, this is kinda weird, huh?"

"Yea. Little bit," Luke replied, scratching the back oh his neck, which Lorelai knew meant that he was nervous.

"I- I don't want it to be weird," Lorelai told him.

"Neither do I," Luke agreed. "So what do we do?"

"Well, to start, there's something that I should probably tell you," Lorelai said, suddenly sounding nervous.

"Okay," Luke responded, not sure if he wanted to know where she was going.

"Well, last week, I…went to Paris-with Chris and Gigi," Luke nodded. He knew that they'd gotten together, but he didn't know that they were serious enough to be going to Paris together.

"Is that all?" He asked.

"Not exactly," Lorelai replied uneasily, suddenly having flashbacks to the night they were packing Luke's truck up and Lorelai had learned of Luke's quickie marriage to Nicole.

"While we were there, Chris-, he uh, he asked me to marry him." Lorelai held her breath, afraid of Luke's response. He looked down at the counter for a minute, and then met her eyes.

_So I sing _

_Baby come back to me_

_In my heart I still believe_

_That we were meant to be _

_Together so whatever it takes_

_Baby come back to me_

_I should've never set you free_

_Love maybe_

_Come back_

"Maybe you'd better go," he told her suddenly, pain evident in his eyes.

**TBC!!**

**There's one chapter left, and I'll get it up ASAP if you review!! **


	4. It's Not Over

**Wow, so this whole last chapter thing took a lot longer than I expected. Sorry! Would you believe that I had this typed up on my computer since I posted the last chapter? Yea, I'm a bit of a procrastinator. But I made some changes to this chapter. I originally had it set to _I'll Be_ by Edwin McCain(**_I'll be your crying shoulder/I'll be your love suicide/And I'll be better when I'm older/I'll be the greatest fan of your life)_**, but I changed it to _It's Not Over_ by Daughtry, because I thought the lyrics fit better. So, this is the last chapter. I really hope you like it! And please Review!

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**Chapter 4- It's Not Over**

"_Maybe you'd better go," he told her suddenly, pain evident in his eyes_.

"W-what?" Lorelai asked, bewildered.

"I just, I cant do this, Lorelai."

"Do what?"

"I can't stand here and listen to you talk about marrying Christopher!"

"No, Luke-," Lorelai tried to tell him, shaking her head.

"Lorelai-,"

"Luke!' She cut in. "I am not marrying Chris!"

_I was blown away  
What could I say  
It all seemed to make sense.  
You've taken away everything  
And I can't deal with that.  
I try to see the good in life.  
But good things in life are hard to find.  
I'll blow it away, blow it away  
Can we make this something good?_

"But you said-,"

"I said he _asked _me to marry him. I told him I couldn't."

"Why couldn't you?" Luke asked, suddenly feeling a spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, there would be another chance for them.

"Because I-," Lorelai wanted to say so many things. _Because I miss you, because I _love _you, _but she couldn't. "I don't know," she finally mumbles, her gaze dropping from Luke's eyes to her half empty coffee cup. She could see the disappointment register in Luke's eyes. This was ridiculous. If she wanted him back, she was going to have to tell him the truth.

_(Well I'll try to do to it right this time around)  
Let's start over,  
Try to do it right this time around  
It's not over  
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over._

"Luke, I really missed…" This was it. She would tell him how she felt and maybe, just maybe, things begin to be okay. But as she met the intensity in his eyes, she got scared. "…this coffee. I swear you make the best coffee in the world." The disappointed returned to Luke's face as he nodded in response.

Lorelai signed. This really was insane. Luke had been a huge part of her life for almost ten years. She had always been able to talk to him. And now she couldn't even muster up a simple "I miss you"? If she ever hoped to get any semblance of a relationship back with Luke, any relationship, she had to tell him how she felt. She took a deep breath.

"The coffee's not the only thing I missed, Luke," Lorelai said suddenly. Luke looked at her, the tiniest glimmer of hope back in his eyes. "I-I missed _you _Luke," she confessed, almost in a whisper. "I know that so much went wrong and what I did was…awful, but not having you in my life-I hate it. Everyday I wake up missing you. I need you, Luke." Lorelai confessed. Luke looked at her, almost in shock.

_I've taken all I can take  
And I cannot wait  
We're wasting too much time  
Being strong and holding on  
Can't let it bring us down_

"Lorelai," he began.

"I know I was an idiot, and I know I shouldn't have pushed you and gone to- him of all people, but I was hurt and confused and I just- I don't know; I snapped. I couldn't take it anymore. I needed to talk to someone, so I went to Chris and we had too much to drink and-,"

"Lorelai," Luke interrupted, mid-rant, "I don't really need the details of that particular part."

"Right. Sorry."

"Why couldn't you talk to me? You always used to be able to talk to me."

"I know. And you'll never know how sorry I am. But I felt like I wasn't as important to you anymore. I know it's selfish, but you had always been able to tell how I felt without me telling you, but suddenly, you couldn't. And it hurt."

_My life with you means everything  
So I won't give up that easily  
I'll blow it away, blow it away_

_Can we make this something good?  
Cause it's all misunderstood_

"Lorelai, I am so sorry. I just- everything was happening so fast, and I didn't know how to deal with it. Regardless, you have always been the most important thing in my life. You and Rory. But now there's April too. But that never made you any less important to me."

"I know that now. But Luke, do you think that we could ever get back what we had?" Luke looked into her eyes. For the first time in a long time, he could see everything that she was feeling, and all of the hurt that he had caused her.

_(Well I'll try to do to it right this time around)  
Let's start over,  
Try to do it right this time around  
It's not over  
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over._

"I think that we have a lot to work out, but I definitely thing that it's worth a try."

"Good," Lorelai said with a smile, her first real smile in almost a year. "'Cause I really, really, missed my diner man."

_We can't let this get away  
Let it out, let it out  
Don't get caught up in yourself  
Let it out._

Luke let the nickname slide for once as he tentatively put his hand on hers.

"I missed you too. But Lorelai, no matter what's going on with us, I want you to know that I'll be there for you."

"Just like on _Friends_!" Lorelai exclaimed. Luke couldn't help but grin as he took a seat in the stool next to her, still holding her hand.

"Yea, we're just like Ross and Rachel," he joked.

"No," Lorelai argued. "It took them like, ten years to make it work." Luke gave her a pointed look. "We've only known each other…wow, we really are Ross and Rachel," Lorelai agreed as the realization hit her of just how long she and Luke had known each other. Luke laughed.

"Wait a minute. Did you just make a _Friends _reference?" Lorelai asked in shock. Luke shrugged. "Wow. I must have really rubbed off on you all these years," Lorelai said.

"Dirty," Luke pointed out with a grin.

"See! There you go again!" Lorelai said, laughing. They were both glad that things seemed to be getting back to normal. Being together, joking and laughing, just always seemed so natural to them, and this time was no different.

_Let's start over  
Well try to do to it right this time around  
Its not over  
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over._

"Lorelai," Luke began seriously after their laughter had died down. "I want this to work this time. We can't keep messing this up."

"I know. I want it to work to. I _need _this to work. I can't lose you again, Luke. I love you too much." Luke pulled her into a sweet kiss.

"I love you too, Lorelai, more than you know. And if you ever feel like I don't or that I'm pushing you away, please just talk to me, okay?"

"I will," Lorelai promised as she leaned into kiss him again. "I missed you so much," she whispered.

"I'm not going anywhere anytime soon," he assured her, giving her hand a squeeze.

_Lets start over  
Its not over  
This love is killin me_**  
**_But you're the only one  
It's not over_

"You know, I definitely think I missed you more than the coffee," Lorelai told him.

"Wow. I must be pretty special." Luke replied.

"You could say that," Lorelai said as Luke pulled her into a hug. They both knew that there was still a lot to sort out, but for right now, they were just glad to be together.

**The end!!  
Thanks so much for reading, I really hope you liked it…please Review, I'd love to know what you thought!**


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